


Everyone? As in... EVERYONE Everyone???

by sweet_bellyache



Series: haikyuu!! [drabbles, hcs, one shots, fics] [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: :(, AsaNoya - Freeform, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Love them, M/M, Smut, but they weren’t even dating, daichi knows, short fic just on my mind, they both feel like shit, they had a fight!!!!!! au, whole gang is dating
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:29:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25043173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweet_bellyache/pseuds/sweet_bellyache
Summary: Asahi and Noya fight before Asahi leaves and they haven’t exactly spoken since.  They both feel like shit but they have separate lives and they don’t feel like they can say anything to apologize because they were so horrible.  Poor boys.  The whole gang is dating lmfao.  Main ships.  Love them.
Relationships: Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu, Ennoshita Chikara/Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Shimizu Kiyoko/Yachi Hitoka, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Series: haikyuu!! [drabbles, hcs, one shots, fics] [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1903384
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. A Reunion?

A harsh wind makes Asahi curl in on himself as he walks to the bus stop, his jacket no longer providing enough to protect him from the cold.He stares into the quickly darkening sky, stars becoming clearer by the minute, and blows out a visible cloud of air.Another chill ghosts over Asahi’s body, and he shivers.

He wishes he dressed warmer.

The bus stop is near, and in the distance he sees the familiar headlights of the bus, itself, and so he hurries in trying to get to the station.Maybe going faster will make him warmer, who knows.

That doesn’t happen, but luckily, he doesn’t have to wait too long for the large bus to roll up in front of the small crowd of people waiting for it.He follows everyone else in front of him, even allowing a couple people that had been walking just behind him cut in front.He doesn’t want to say anything to make anyone upset.

It isn’t like he minds anyways, and he still gets on the bus all the same.He takes up an empty spot where no one is sitting around him, and moves his headphones to cover his red, chilly ears.It’s so much nicer inside the transport, and he feels himself relax into the comforting temperature.His eyes stay wandering over the passing scenery of the busy city and he breathes in time with the beat of his music.

It’s like any other night of Asahi peacefully getting home.

Mostly.

He gets a text.Now that’s not unusual, as he has some friends, but it’s also not a very likely thing to happen.He brings his phone out of his pocket with reddened fingers, and stares in shock at the contact name.Someone he hasn’t spoke to in months at least.

**Sawamura Daichi** , it reads.That name alone cuts Asahi’s breath short.

He doesn’t hate Daichi, in fact, when they were graduating, he and Daichi were very good friends, and had been for years.But Daichi’s name was associated with volleyball.He hadn’t played in years.Any time Daichi spoke to him, volleyball was always a topic brought up.

Volleyball wasn’t a bad thing.He liked it.

But volleyball meant Nishinoya.

Noya had a bad memory attached.

Before Asahi’s head tries to painfully stroll down memory lane, Asahi opens up the message.

**Daichi:** Hey! Are you busy on May 10th?

No, he isn’t busy.He’s never busy anymore.He has quite a boring life, between his office job and literally nothing else.Sure, he has a cat and goes to the gym here and there.But besides those two other things, Asahi is pretty damn lonely and available.

He types up a nervous response.

**Asahi:** I don’t think I am, why do you ask?

That’s not too formal, is it?

Asahi deletes the message, and rewords it.

**Asahi:** I doubt it, why?

Is that too harsh?

It doesn’t matter, because Asahi’s trembling finger slips and hits send.He flinches when he realizes what he’s done, but he releases a breath of defeat when he knows there’s nothing he can do about it.He waits for Daichi’s three dots to turn into a real message, his heart thumping in his stomach as he does.

**Daichi:** We’re throwing a seven year reunion for the team! Everyone’s out of school, and we figured it had been long enough, so we planned a date, and everyone seems to be good with it. You in?

Asahi pauses when he finishes reading the text.

Then he rereads it.

Then he rereads it again.

And again.

And again.

His eyes stop at the words “everyone seems to be good with it”, but they really just stick at “everyone”.

Everyone?

Everyone, as in, Nishinoya?

Asahi flushes as nerves gather in his gut, anxiety crashing heavy on him at the thought of seeing his sort-of-ex.He hasn’t seen Noya in years.

He feels sick all of a sudden, and the idea of talking with Noya after all these years makes his head spin.What would he even say?Would he apologize?What—

**Daichi:** Noya will be there, are you okay with that?

Oh, right, he hasn’t answered.And Daichi is still able to read him like a magazine without even seeing him. 

He pulls together the courage to answer.

**Asahi:** Yeah, I’m probably good then. And I’m okay, I’m over it. It’s been years, y’know :P

He’s spitting obvious bullshit, and if there’s anyone to call him out on it, it’s Daichi.But, he supposes that if he tries to convince others that he’s okay, he’ll be able to fake it enough to convince himself as well.It had been years, after all.Although, he hasn’t been in a real relationship since his feelings for the libero, and the only one he got in was with another short guy from college that seriously reminded Asahi of the younger volleyball player.That didn’t last long though.

**Daichi:** Okay, just making sure, and it’ll probably be in the old gym, so you might want to bring some athletic clothes in case we decide to hit the ball around for old times’ sake! :)

Daichi’s message puts a half smile on Asahi’s face, and then some anxious nerves jump in his belly when he remembers he hasn’t played volleyball in years.He did a little in college, but it was mostly recreational and in local clubs or sometimes just beach tournaments.He stopped playing by junior year in college, and it became a mere memory by then.It reminded him too much of Noya, and it distracted him.

Asahi shakes his head to stop thinking too hard.He’ll have to get the okay from his boss, but he’s not too worried about that.No, he’s still worried about seeing Noya.

He tries to shut his thoughts down so he doesn’t continue dwelling on the small fling he and the younger boy shared, but everything comes back all too quickly.

•

“Asahi-san!” He hears his crush call from behind him.Asahi turns around, and so do a couple strangers nearby, to see a bright smiling teen running full speed at him.He smiles, albeit nervous that Noya might decide to hurl his whole body weight at Asahi with full faith that Asahi won’t let him fall.

Wouldn’t be the first time.

However, much to Asahi’s relief, Noya only engulfs him in a tight hug around his low middle, and Asahi feels his heart swell before he returns it.

“Hey, Noya,” he says as Noya beams up at him.“Did you take the bus?”

“Nah, I biked,” Noya grins. “I’d get too antsy on the bus.” If he had taken maybe two seconds to look at Noya he might’ve noticed, but he realizes after Noya says anything.

Noya is sweaty as hell, with dark pit stains and another large sweat stain around his neck.Additionally, his hair is slicked by his skin and his breath is hot and shallow.His chest heaves noticeably, and his face is flush pink.

Asahi continues his path, although he has pulled his hand from his pocket to lace his fingers with his counterpart’s slightly sweaty palm, and he’s smiling warmly at the shorter boy.

“Ah,” he nods. “That explains why you look like you just worked out.” Noya uses a dry part of his shirt to wipe off the dampness on his forehead, but spares a glance to Asahi that makes his ears go red.

“I’m not completely worn out, y’know.I wouldn’t mind getting a little sweatier before tonight.” The tall teen tenses up as Noya smirks at him, and he forces himself to break eye contact in fear of turning into a fucking tomato.

“Noya,” Asahi whimpers. “You can’t say stuff like that in public.” However, this dance never ends in Asahi’s favor, and this one proves to be all the same when Noya moves his hand from Asahi’s down to the small of Asahi’s back.

“You mean you’d like to take this somewhere private?” Noya teases.Asahi rubs a hand over his heated face, mostly trying to hide the overwhelming blush.He flusters so easily and Noya knows.

Thankfully, Asahi’s house isn’t much further, and Noya’s eager horniness pushes Asahi to go a bit faster than normal.

•

The room is near silent, save for the sound of Asahi’s fingers gently combing through Noya’s hair and Noya drawing thoughtless patterns across Asahi’s bare chest.

Asahi always finds it slightly funny after he and Noya screw that Noya quiets down immensely, going from chatting about practically any thought on his mind to maybe whispering soft words into Asahi’s skin.Usually ones of praise, followed by Asahi’s own praise of Noya in return.

Although, he can’t exactly blame Noya.After all, even Asahi knows that Noya blabbers during sex loud and shamelessly.The libero begs, moans, whines, yelps, and cries.Don’t even get Asahi started about Noya coming.He practically yells for Asahi to go as hard as he can.Asahi is a bit quieter, but he knows he feels almost the same amount of pleasure.Listening to Noya go on and on helps get him off, if he’s really honest.

What?Begging is pretty fucking hot.

Nonetheless, Noya is peacefully curled into Asahi’s side as they come down from their blissed out orgasm highs, and Asahi plants a soft kiss to the top of his lover’s head.

“Asahi-san?” Noya asks, and Asahi muses him with a small grunt. “Are you nervous about not going to school together next year?”

Asahi’s fingers stop in Noya’s hair, as he hasn’t heard Noya ask about that kind of thing, ever really.

Always a first for everything, he supposes.

“Not really,” he finally says, resuming combing through his lover’s strands.However, he can tell the shorter boy is still obviously thinking hard about it. “I don’t exactly worry about what we have.I trust us to stay together.”

“But how can we stay together if we’re not even really together?” Noya sits up and looks back at Asahi, the question clearly sitting on his chest for much too long.

“Noya, you know I’m not out to my parents yet,” Asahi almost pleads. “I’m not sure I’m ready for that.”

That hits something inside Noya, from the way his expression tightens up with a few more unassured fears.

Asahi isn’t exactly out at all.Daichi and Suga know, and obviously so does Noya, but most of the volleyball team is unaware, and so are most of his other friends.It’s scary after all.

But Noya is very excited to finally spill to everyone that they’re ‘dating’.But they aren’t really.It’s just a little fling, a little crush, Asahi supposes.He’s hoping he can finally say one day that he’s dating Noya, but he doubts it will come soon.

And he knows Noya isn’t very happy with that.He’s been patient for a while, but now he feels...

“Do you even want people to know you’re dating me?” Noya looks hurt. “And I don’t mean dating a boy, I mean dating me.You aren’t ashamed of me, are you?” Asahi feels the misunderstanding go straight to his heart, and he quickly moves to take Noya’s hand in his own.

“No, no, it’s not that, Noya,” he assures him as best he can. “I’m just not ready.” That doesn’t do much, and he sees the new onslaught of emotion that comes over Noya’s face.

“Well, Asahi, you haven’t been ready for several months now, but we’re still doing this.When do I get to shout it from the rooftops?” Noya counters, then he shakes his head. “And I don’t mean to sound selfish, Asahi, I really don’t.I want you to be ready, but I’m just scared you don’t want people to know about me, specifically.I feel like we wouldn’t have this problem if I just... wasn’t me.”

Asahi feels his heart hammer in his chest because no, that’s not it, he loves Noya for who he is, and he doesn’t want to do this with anyone else and he loves being around Noya.

“It’s not you!I do love you, Noya, so much, but I’m just... I’m scared of what my parents might say.” 

Noya pulls his hands from Asahi’s.Asahi feels his heart stop.

“How do I know you love me,” he swallows, “if you won’t tell anyone about us?” There’s a thick sadness heavy in his tone, and Asahi sees it with his own eyes as a tear rolls down Noya’s cheek.

“I love you, Asahi,” Noya speaks in such a heartfelt tone that Asahi feels his own heart shattering.His voice, it’s not a assuring statement. “But I feel like you’re ashamed of me.And I know this will be hard, but when you’re ready for everyone to know about us, let me know.”

Noya gets off the bed, pulling his clothes from off the floor to begin putting them back on.

“Until then...”

Asahi’s heart is thundering so hard in his ribs, he’s sure Noya can hear it from across the room.Noya glances back at Asahi, and wipes a tear from his eye.

“I think we aren’t ready to be together.”

A breath stutters out from Asahi’s lips, but as he tries to say something—anything—to get Noya to stay, Noya turns around, and leaves.

The door shutting is what finally pulls Asahi from the frozen posture he’d been stuck in.

He jumps off his bed and throws on random pieces of clothing from his closet and off the floor.He’s tugging his pants on his legs as he hops out of the room, and sees Noya closing the front door.

He rushes down the stairs, and calls out to him on the sidewalk.

Noya turns, eyes red and betrayed.

He feels speechless.His heart is in his throat, but he can’t say the words he needs to.What would he even say?

“Noya, I...” he trails off, and a terror inside him grows as Noya looks away from him.

“Goodbye, Asahi,” he says, voice shaking.

That’s what makes Asahi crumble.

•

It took Asahi another two years to finally come out to his parents, but by then, Noya was just an old lover.Asahi would be lying if he said he didn’t come out to his parents with the hope that maybe he and Noya would get together again, but he knew it was hopeless in the long run.He had no idea what Noya had even been up to in the past few years, besides hearing bits and pieces from old friends.He knew he went to a pretty good college on a volleyball scholarship—unsurprising to Asahi—but that was mostly it.He hadn’t spoken to the libero in so long.

After their split, Asahi cried for weeks. 

He and Noya hadn’t even been ‘together’ a year, but he and Noya had such a special bond that Asahi knew he was going to be troubled for some time.

He forced himself to get over Noya in college, and as hard as it was, he did it.Noya became an after thought, or something he wouldn’t think of on a regular basis.It wasn’t much, but it was progress.

But now this.

He’ll see Noya again.

So many emotions come back, but thinking about all of them makes Asahi sick.Won’t it be better if he just doesn’t think about it?

That’s advice Noya gave to him a bit.If something is stressing him out, and it’s almost completely out of his control, like having to play an especially difficult team, the most he can do is acknowledge it, and prepare himself as best he can.Dwelling and freaking out won’t solve any problems.

So Asahi takes a deep breath, and gets ready to finish up his night, knowing that he can’t stop the reunion from coming, and that he might as well look forward to seeing everyone again.

But as he gets into bed for the night, he can’t help reminiscing what might’ve been between him and Noya had he just gathered the guts to come out.

He always was such a fucking coward.

———

“See you tomorrow, you bastard!” Noya shouts to his friend as his shift ends.His friend waves back at him, calling something in return that Noya doesn’t entirely catch.

He hops on his motorcycle and fastens his helmet, revving up the engine thoughtlessly.The wind bristles past him, but he doesn’t feel it through the layers he has on.He does appreciate the busy scenery of the city as he rides down the streets, watching lampposts pass and restaurant signs flicker with age.

Noya fixed up the bike between his legs in his sophomore year of college.He loves the thing, and he’s been through a lot with it.The seat has an imprint from him which makes it comfier to sit in, and he designed the sides to have tasteful yellow lightning strips against black, a theme he took up in high school.He even added little bolts to his helmet.

As Noya comes up to a stop light, he glances to the side and sees a pretty lady who catches his eye for a moment.Noya does a little flirty tip of his fingers, and the woman laughs as she accelerates through the green light.It’s never worked for him, but he does enjoy doing it to people passing by.His mind is relatively blank, and as he arrives at his apartment, he feels a buzz in his pocket that he assumes is a coworker asking for a favor.

Noya pulls his phone out, but freezes when he sees the contact.

**sawamura DADchi**

He’s a bit shocked, but he opens the message eagerly, wanting to see what the old friend has to say.

**DADchi:** Hey! Are you busy May 10th?

Noya doesn’t think he is busy.He goes drinking with his buddies every so often, but he can always cancel.It’s just drinks.

He responds quickly.

**Nishinoya:** nope!! what’d u have in mind????

His hand mindlessly opens his front door, and his instinct immediately greets his ferret.

“Yori!Where’s my little rascal?” The ferret is busy in her little area, but she still acknowledges Noya and gets excited as he approaches.

“Someone happy to see me?” Noya grins as the ferret giddily waits for him to open the door for her to jump up on him, and when he finally does, Yori is running up all over his arms and over his body.

Noya got Yori a while back.Yori is great company, and just as wild as he is, so he takes her out a lot to parks, on runs, and generally to wherever he feels like going for the day.Just not work.

Noya feels a buzz in his pocket.

**DADchi:** The volleyball team is having a seven year reunion! We’re all out of school, and almost everyone seems to be available—can I count you in?

Noya’s smile falls.He knows what everyone means.

**Nishinoya:** sounds great! but almost everyone?

That’s vague enough, right?

**DADchi:** Well, I haven’t gotten the okay from Kinoshita or Asahi yet, but everyone else seems to be good!

**DADchi:** Will you be okay if Asahi comes?

Noya feels a prick in his eye, but he shakes his head and takes a breath.He won’t allow the guilt to break him.

**Nishinoya:** i’m fine!!! can’t wait to see everyone again!!!! :D

But as Noya presses send, he sniffles.

** DADchi:  ** Don’t forget volleyball clothes in case we start a game! It’ll be in the same gym!

Noya reads the message, tries to press a smile to his face, but ultimately breaks down into tears.

If only he wasn’t such a selfish prick.


	2. Is It Too Late Now To Say Sorry?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ahh ... short chapter of asahi and noya talking .... yeah

Asahi stares at the old gym.

_Is he really up for this?_

He doesn’t know.But it’s too fucking late at this point. 

His feet take slow, anxious strides towards the doors, and memories flood back like rivers in his head.Everything feels a bit familiar, but in a far away sense.He feels detached from all of it.

He still feels a distant warmth that pulls him towards the gym.

The doors are open, and Asahi’s eyes brighten up when he sees faces he hasn’t seen for years.

He catches Daichi chatting with Kageyama, Suga grabbing a drink, Hinata giggling with Yamaguchi and Yachi while Tsukishima smiles with Kinoshita and Narita.Kiyoko walks up to Suga, but her eyes are fixed on Yachi from a distance before she focuses her attention on Suga entirely.

The familiar faces all turn to Asahi, who smiles as several start approaching.

“ASAHI-SAN!!” Hinata is still very loud. 

Daichi, Suga, and Kiyoko follow not so far behind, while the others trail with warm welcomes behind them.

It’s all happy hello’s and excited hugs and some tearful greetings, but not long after Asahi has arrived, everyone sort of goes back to before.Some are in small groups, talking about God knows what, and others are busying themselves with food or looking for others to catch up with.

Asahi feels at peace, especially as he talks with Kageyama about college and what they ended up doing, etc.

Everyone seems to look different.Kageyama has a shorter hairstyle, although it’s not so different from high school, and he looks much stronger than seven years ago.He’s almost as tall as Asahi by now, and he also has his nails painted a crisp blue.It’s a good look.

“Hinata and I still play beach sometimes, but we bought a small house a while back,” Kageyama smiles.He also smiles.Quite a lot. “We have a cat named Miso, so we try not to leave him alone too much.”

Asahi suddenly connects what Kageyama is saying.

“Wait, you two are together?” he asks, clearly surprised.

Kageyama nods, giving Asahi a look that asks ‘Didn’t you know that?’ 

“We got together in our third year.Everything sort of worked out.” Kageyama looks to Hinata, who is brightly giggling with Yachi and Yamaguchi again.Asahi sees a devoted love in Kageyama’s eyes and gets a pang of understanding sadness.

He’s happy that they are happy together, but Asahi feels the loneliness of being single bite back at him.Then he remembers Noya, who should be showing up soon—

“What’s up, you old bastards!” Tanaka’s voice shouts through the gym.Asahi grins as he hears the past rebel barge in with a clear platonic love in his enthusiasm.

Tanaka has also changed.He’s wearing silver and gold chains, and Asahi definitely notices some silver teeth shining in the shitty gym lights.Is there some _kanji_ tattooed on Tanaka’s _neck_?

Ennoshita goes over and lays one on him, and Asahi staggers in a state of shock.

_Tanaka... and Ennoshita are_ together _?_

“Why are you so late?” Ennoshita scolds him, but there’s a smile that Asahi notices shining through.

“Sorry,” Tanaka scratches the back of his head, which has stripes shaved into the sides. “Saw someone on the street and we got distracted.” It looks hilarious when Ennoshita begins scolding a tough and rugged looking Tanaka like a child, and Asahi figures their relationship of Ennoshita keeping Tanaka in his place has not changed one bit.

“You got distracted while driving?!By who?!” Suga seems to side with Ennoshita by standing right next to him with his hands planted on his hips.

Tanaka shies down, but points to the door with an apologetic smile.

Everyone turns to the doors, and Asahi forgets to breathe when he sees a small 24 year old staring challengingly at Tanaka.

Noya still has the flare of blond in the front of his hair, but he has also got a new blond strip that wraps around his head.It looks like lightning.He’s sporting silver earrings and a lip ring.And what looks to be an old white... band of some sort... wrapped around his wrist a couple times.Noya’s legs are sculpted in the calves, and his small arms are built by his shoulders.Asahi doesn’t remember him looking that strong.

“Ryuu, you bastard, I’ll kill you for cutting me off!” he shouts, immediately going red when Daichi, Suga, and Ennoshita give him accusatory looks.

It lasts about a second before they all break into laughter and share a huge hug.

But Asahi can’t bring himself to move as he watches Noya interact with everyone.Kageyama seems to notice.

Instead of saying anything, he follows Asahi’s anxious stare, and gives him a look of sympathy.

“Something happen?” he asks gently.Asahi nods, staring longingly at his old flame.

Kageyama has totally changed, and Asahi is entirely surprised when he tells Asahi he’ll try to distract Noya so Asahi can take a breath outside for a moment.

Asahi can’t help but watch as Hinata goes over to Noya and squeals in awe at all the new changes to his body.Then Kageyama goes and smiles brightly (still a shock) with his boyfriend and chats up a storm with Yuu.

Asahi finds an escape where no one is looking, and feels the cool air seep deep into his lungs.His heart slows gradually, but he can still feel the pulse in his eardrums.He tells himself to act natural.To act like nothing happened.You are only friends now.No matter what’s happened. 

Footsteps approach him, and Asahi beats in his ears.

**Don’t be Noya, don’t be Noya—**

“Asahi?” Suga’s voice.Asahi lets out a breath.“Are you alright?”

Asahi smiles nervously, contemplating telling Suga what’s wrong.

“Ah, I’m alright,” he brushes off. “Just needed a bit of air.” _APPARENTLY_ his friends know him _WAY_ better than he realized, _EVEN_ after _SO_ _LONG_ with no communication.Suga goes soft at his words.

“Is it Noya?” he asks, placing a hand on Asahi’s back.Asahi figures there’s no point in hiding it.He sighs, looking at his feet.He nods in defeat.

“I didn’t realize it would hurt so much to see him.I thought it would be fine.I’m a fucking adult.” The swear makes Suga flinch—almost unnoticeably—and Asahi immediately apologizes.

“I’m sorry, Suga,” he looks over to his friend. “I just didn’t realize I was still not over him.It’s been _years_.” 

“Maybe you should try talking to him,” Suga suggests gently. “You don’t have to if you don’t feel ready, but facing this stuff head on might... just might make it easier.I can’t be sure though, you do what feels right.But I don’t want to hear any more negative goatee!” Suga smiles with the last part, and Asahi can’t help but return it.

Suga pulls Asahi into a small, comfort hug, and Asahi feels better.He knows Suga is here for him.Even if it’s been much too long.He’s thankful for having him in his life.

“Suga?What are you—”

Asahi freezes.His heart lodges in his throat, and every part of him tightens up.He can’t move, but Suga detaches from the hug to help him.

“Noya!Sorry, I was just checking on Asahi,” Suga gestures to a frozen Asahi. “He just needed some air.”

Now Noya fucking knows that Asahi came out after he arrived, and now Asahi can’t even look him in the eyes.Not those eyes.

“Ah,” Noya forces out.Asahi hears the discomfort in his voice. “Well, I was ju—”

“You two should catch up!I’ll just be inside, if you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask!”

Asahi can’t breathe.He’s about to have an attack.He can feel it.Oh fuck, _deep breaths.Get air in your lungs, quickly come on—_

Suga leaves.

Asahi looks to Noya, who looks as good as ever, and just as uncomfortable as him.There’s something in those bright amber eyes that seems empty.There’s an emotion he can feel in himself when he looks at Noya.

“Asahi-san,” Noya breathes.Asahi feels a sting in his heart.There’s a soft, slightly forced smile on Noya’s face. “Didn’t see you come out here.”

Asahi has to press a smile up in his lips, feeling his heart shatter as the boy he once held closer than anyone else talk with him like a stranger.

“Ah, I didn’t notice you came in.I was just getting a little stuffy in the gym.” A horrid lie, and he immediately feels terrible for letting one go on Noya so easily.

“Oh,” Noya sighs. “I’m glad it didn’t have to do with me.” There’s relief in his voice, but the way he brings up the past so quickly makes Asahi go frigid. 

_Should they talk about it_?

Asahi chuckles the most fake laugh he’s done in his life.

“It’s nothing like that, don’t worry.” He assures, and Noya nods, all too awkwardly.When did things get _so bad_?

“I’m going to go get a drink,” he grins, crying on the inside when he sees Noya’s expression fall slightly. “Did you want to join—”

“Asahi-san,” Noya says it with a slight plea.Asahi looks back.The tone is all too familiar.“Can we talk?”

Asahi nods barely, then he nods again, and mutters an ‘Of course.’

•

Asahi steps back from the door, giving his full attention to the shorter man who’s giving him a look that reminds Asahi of when he didn’t want to return to volleyball his third year because of getting blocked during a Date Tech match.

Noya’s eyes turn red, but he bows until his face is staring down at the sidewalk before Asahi can comment.

“I-I’m sorry for being so selfish!” He yells, but his voice is shaking and Asahi can hear the thickness of emotion that tugs at his tone. “I should’ve never p-pressured you into doing something you weren’t ready for, and I am so sorry!”

When Noya brings his head up again, there are tears gathering in watery irises, and one falls down his cheek while his hands tremble by his sides.

“N-Noya, I—”

“And I completely understand if you still h-hate me,” Noya winces with his words. ”I’m not asking for forgiveness, I’m just letting you know that what I did was terrible, a-and I’ve changed a lot.I’m sorry I ever put you through that, and I h-hope you know that if I could turn back the clock, I would.” A few drops roll down Noya’s face, and Asahi feels at a loss of words.He can’t remember the last time Noya cried in front of him.

Asahi is also in shock.He always... blamed himself for what happened.Because if he had just come out, Noya wouldn’t have felt unappreciated.

“But... you felt... you felt unloved, Noya.” Asahi’s eyes water at the memory. “I couldn’t even show you how much y—”

“No!” Noya interrupts, shaky breaths leaving trembling lips. “Y-You shouldn’t feel a-at fault for what happened!I was... I was so selfish.” Noya squeezes his eyes shut.

“I was so... immature.And entitled.I didn’t realize what I had done until afterwards.I mean, fuck, I had you!You’re amazing!And if someone had told me to come out when I wasn’t ready...” Noya trails off, a pained expression tightening over his face.He lets out a soft cry, and his hands curl into white knuckled fists.

“Fuck, Asahi!” he cries. “I was heartless!God, I was so fucking... I put you through that shit.” Noya breaks in front of Asahi’s eyes, and he can’t help but feel overcome with the need to wrap his arms around the man falling apart in front of him.

Noya speaks up again before Asahi can move.

“I’m sorry for being such a fucking cry baby about it seven years later, but,” Noya sniffles, “I never even apologized.And I just needed you to know, it was entirely my fault.I-I was shit to you, and I know you usually blame yourself, so I needed to clarify.Just tell me you understand—”

“Thank you,” Asahi breathes out.Noya cuts himself off, looking at Asahi with something in his eyes that Asahi can’t identify, but he can feel deep within him. “I mean, I just... I thought about that fight for so long.I tried getting over you but I kept feeling like I let you down.I couldn’t even show you how I felt.”

He sees Noya bubble up into soft snivels, but he continues.

“And I know, it’s probably meaningless all these years later, but I’m just glad you understand how much I care for you.I was so scared that the message wasn’t getting across.So thank you, for letting me know you were also thinking about me.”

Asahi watches as Noya crumbles, bubbling over with emotions and slowly walking over to Asahi, big eyes full of huge tears.

Noya wraps his short arms around Asahi’s middle, giving Asahi a flash of memory before he engulfs Noya as well.

Asahi still dwarfs him after all this time.It’s a little funny to him, but it just reminds him of all the times they had together where Asahi could carry Noya around, where Noya could lay on top of Asahi and fall asleep without disturbing him, and countless of others where Asahi fell in love with Noya’s lack in height.

But Noya feels different.His muscles have changed.His hair is spikier, but softer as well.He has matured in more ways than one, and as much as he hates to admit it, Asahi feels every corny ass emotion rush back to his heart like it was the first time he had noticed Noya in that light.

“I’m sorry I treated you like shit.I regret that day so fucking much.” Noya cries into Asahi’s shirt.His hands tighten on the material, clinging to Asahi like a lifeline.Asahi drops a couple tears as well.

“It’s... I don’t...” Asahi can’t respond in confidence.There’s so much going through his head he might faint. “I don’t know how I feel right now, but I do know that I’m glad we could talk.This means a lot to me, Noya.Thank you.”

Noya stays in his embrace for a little longer, hiccups shaking his body.He holds Asahi like if he lets go, he’ll never get the chance again.

But it ends, and Noya pulls away—red, swollen eyes staring up at Asahi’s.There’s something inside his chest that releases.He’s not sure what, but it allows him to take deeper breaths.Like a harsh pressure just... disappeared.

Noya wipes his eyes with the backs of his hands, hasty and messy and slightly reckless.It does some, and Noya’s tears stop falling down his tear-tracked cheeks.

“I never...” Noya lets a trembling sigh loose, and Asahi thinks he might start crying again. “I never called you, or... ever apologized.And even if you don’t forgive me, I just wanted to let you know I’m sorry.I’m glad I could clear the air.”

Asahi nods, unsure of what else to say.It seems a bit too formal.This isn’t what they used to talk like.He doesn’t want Noya walking on eggshells around him.He wants to lighten the tension.

“I mean, I think I forgive you,” Asahi looks to the sky, which is a darker blue than normal, but it’s still daylight, and the sun hasn’t set entirely. “Like I said, I’m a little... thrown.But I missed you, Noya.I’d be lying if I said I was mad at you.” Noya looks down guiltily after Asahi says that.

“You should be,” he mutters thickly. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” Asahi frowns at the blame Noya presses on himself.

“You’ve clearly grown,” he rests a hand on Noya’s shoulder, and those big, warm, hazel eyes look up at him.They’re still wet, lingering tears taking sweet time to dry up. “It was years ago, and... and we were only teens.It seems like you didn’t mean it.I... I forgive you, Noya.”

Noya smiles, but his eyes gave away his emotional reaction with the way they redden again. 

“I’m really sorry for how I acted, Asahi-san,” he apologizes again, unable to meet his gaze. “Thank you, for listening to me after everything.”

Asahi smiles at him, but there’s a little part of him that just... aches.He’s not sure for what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> summer depression...  
> so much time to question ,, my life!!!
> 
> yeah basically i’ve been really depressed for a good long while and writing just feels impossible. it’s sooo sooo draining and now i’m on my lunch break for virtual school so i gotta get back now actually mb. i can’t promise updated works. i can promise my best, but my best won’t be great. i’m sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for not updating my main fic!!!!! writers block hit like a brick and i have no motivation lmfaooooo but i’m going to try to push a chapter out at some point. idk when. love you.


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